“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them- that only creates sorrow. Let reality be a reality. Let the things flow forward in a natural way.” – Lao Tzu
There has been a fairly long silence from my end. But the silence has been worth it. We have been in the process of shifting out and moving into a new place supposedly going to be our home for the next 2 years (please God … as I am tired of shifting again and again). Though change is termed as the only constant, I am still very resistant to change. I take a lot of time to find my comfort zone. And once I have found it I refuse to let go it. But then I forget that “The only constant in life is, change”.
We all have to face changes almost every day. It can be something so small that it is not noticed at all or something huge which we often wonder how to go about it. Everything around us from the weather to our meetings to some unexpected changes happens around us.
How change affects me … I wonder how I will manage with all the disruptions that change is going to cause. Even before the change, I start fearing it just for the simple fact how I will cope up. I wonder how I will make new friends (owing to the fact that I am an introvert), how I will find the closest market, how I will travel from that place and how will my daughter be affected with all of this. Will she be able to gel in smoothly or will she have inhibitions just like me? When the change takes place we often don’t talk to each other as it just increases our anxiety.
But this time the change was good. Instead of fretting and cribbing, I told myself it is going to be good. I kept telling this to myself a week before we shifted. I tried to find the positive rather than the negatives. With this change, I looked at the opportunities that were coming my way. I tried to nurture my thinking towards how I can grow my opportunities. It made me realise who I am and where am I headed.
While preparing myself for this change I also came across “The 5 R’s of Change”. The 5 R’s really helped me in this transition of change and I was much more comfortable rather than being restless.
- Relax: Don’t overload your mind with the change all the time. Try to take things lightly and take off your mind from the change through exercise, healthy lifestyle and meditation.
- Reflect: Try to sit and analyse on what is happening. Reflect on your feelings be it positive or negative. Don’t hide the negative feelings. It is always good to vent them out but keep in mind the effects it can have on you as well as the people around you. If you feel overpowered by your feelings it is good to talk to someone.
- Reassess: Assess the feelings you have. Set aside the positive ones from the negative ones. Don’t pay much heed to the negative ones as they only help by increasing stress. Try to create positive vibes about the change. That way it becomes easier to embrace change.
- Rehearse: Think about how you can deal with the change. Seek for answers that make you feel better regarding the whole change. Often going over events and rehearsing them makes the whole process of change easier by lowering the hidden anxiety.
- Ritualize: Try to stay as sane as possible, as calm as possible and do your day to day activities which are not going to change. Often looking out for familiar things help to reduce stress.
Change is a very normal part of our everyday life. Change of age, place, season, habit, relation … all of these are good enough to cause anxiety and stress. When we accept change with open arms, we not only become resilient but also show that we have the ability to adjust to change. Living with the attitude of gratitude definitely helps to embrace change not as a hurdle but as an opportunity which helps to grow.
I would love to know how you cope with changes in your lives. Do you feel as stressed out like me or are calm about the whole thing?
Linking this post with Corinne’s #MondayMusings